Canned Philosophy

So I'm in Morrisons helping with the weekly shop. I'm standing next to the tinned vegetables and it occurs to me that it is a good job that the Green Giant was jolly. If he had turned out out to be a nasty piece of work he could have caused a lot of trouble, what with being very tall and all that. And I bet the sweetcorn wouldn't have tasted as nice.

Had some stupid sports thing on the telly this evening. "..and this athlete has a heart twice the size of an average woman". Wow. I make an average woman around 5 feet six tall. That's some heart....

Not as good as my favourite though: "The new Vauxhall Vectra is now available with a choice of sixteen engines". I bet that it goes fast. But the fuel economy is probably rubbish.